The Problem With Breathing: Part III
I really wish, I reflected over a cup of coffee and to no-one in particular, that I was more ambitious. I have precisely zero motivation to be the boss (I’m self-employed so technically I am the boss and frequently ‘Employee of the Month’), but I do seem to be lacking in career goals.
Perhaps, I mused, this should be more of a cause for concern. No one responded. I took this silence as tacit agreement.
But, I later countered to the fluff under the sofa, I do have running goals so it’s not like I don’t know how to set them.
“What are they then?”, my unhelpful brain chimed in. Well, at this moment it’s to maintain my mileage over the winter and explore more of the South Downs, ACTUALLY BRAIN.
“What about getting to 5k in under 30 minutes? What happened to that then?” That, my unhelpful cerebral appendage, has not materialised and the reason for that is because IT. WAS. NOT. FUN.
I did not enjoy running fast enough to feel a bit sick. I did not enjoy sacrificing long, slow plods in nature for speedwork round a squelchy park. The only bit I did enjoy was discovering the word Fartlek. The Swedish word for “speed play”. FARTLEK.
Motivation, Not Perspiration or Something
But windy words are not enough to keep me motivated. Discovering what does motivate you, allows you to change your goalposts to ones that mean more to you, and I think that’s true of life too. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.
Here’s an example of what I mean. Say you’re someone who wants to lose weight — that’s the goal. You stick your body into a calorie deficit, you work out, you say no to wine, chocolate, nights out, takeaways in. You get there, BOOM, but you’re so goddam miserable. At some point you go: “maybe the goal is health, rather than weight” and then you do it all a bit differently. You discover you love walking, or golf, or fencing. I just feel I’d be good at fencing. You say yes to food without stressing about it and you feel healthy, well and better.
The best thing about changing that goalpost is that it then becomes sustainable. It’s there for the rest of your life.
“Who are you Brené Brown?”
Shuddit brain. Let’s talk running again.
In my mind I am a bohemian creative, who literally writes beauty and can roll with the ebb and flow of life. In reality, I am a deadline driven, routine oriented middle-aged woman who likes a good podcast. For the record I was a teen in the 90s, you have no proof, no proof at all of what me and my mate Ellie got up to in that heady decade. The music though…
I digress. When it comes to setting running goals, the only person you need to please is yourself. Not other runners, not bloody Strava and certainly not that swishy pony-tailed gazelle, cantering past you. Especially not her.
Running trails has revolutionised how I feel about runs. Taking time to stop and take a photo of a bird (I now look up birds on The Google — what a legend), discovering a route I’ve never run before, winding my way slowly up a rocky path, through dappled autumnal colours — it’s a joy and my goal is simply to find that joy every time I pull on a pair of Brooks Ghost 13 trainers. Other brands are available (but are they though?).
